难以说出的心情

我最近的心情比较反复, 有时好, 有时坏, 有时开心无比, 有时很寂寞, 很想找一个人陪伴着自己. 自从认识他了之后, 我觉得自己是世界上最幸运的那一个. 我开始变得很依赖他. 在这几年里, 我有什么不开心的, 想不通的, 或者是一些生活上的小决定, 我都会第一就去问他, 向他那意见. 一直到我们在一起, 我们也和往常一样, 很开心, 很快乐. 这是因为我们两个还读着书, 所以时间变动比较容易, 没那么紧逼.
现在, 他必须工作了. 没办法在读书因为经济问题. 他也转了几份工, 终于找到一个适合自己的了. 这也可以说是一种安慰. 但是有时侯的我会不开心, 觉得很寂寞. 有时侯晚上时会掉眼泪. 自从我上个星期从北京旅行回来之后, 我们两个都没办法见面. 他这一份工需要他从早做到晚, 连睡觉的时间都少了. 看他那么辛苦, 我也很心痛. 不过, 有时侯的我也瞒开心的. 他比以前积极了很多, 他会常常去模仿成功人士的做法来让自己有出人头地的一天. 他甚至有想过和我组织一个家庭. 不过, 这也是以后的事吧! 说真的, 我也很盼望有这样的一天.
现在的我的确是有点闷, 从早到晚无所事事的, 所以才会胡思乱想. 等到下个星期开学了以后, 有功课让我忙了, 时间就会过的很快. 半年之后, 等他的工做稳定下来以后, 我们就会有比较多的时间在一起了. 我多么盼望那一天快点到.
和他在一起后, 我都没想过其他人, 或盼望我爱情生活中有什么变化. 这是因为我的心情已经定下来了, 而我的心也完完全全的给了他. 我甚至想带他去见我的家人. 不过, 我知道现在还不是时候. 总而言之, 我对这分感情, 和他的爱, 是难以形容的.
不知道他会不会看到我所写的呢? 他会有什么反应呢?

Fun Outing with the Girlz

Today, the ARGS girls had had an outing at Times Square. Although it was tiring, we did take a lot of photos - at least some memories for all of us. We had a chat during lunch and we shared unexpected things that had happened together. I have come to know that strange relationships are surrounding us now and being as their friends, we just need to accept that. It is their choice and we hardly could do anything to stop it.
After lunch we had a walk in the complex(which I used to walk with him quite often before he started working), I had a bad feeling and I felt like I wanted to repeat what he and I have done during the past lovely and memorable days - walking with him all around the complex, go for movies at the cinema as often as watching television at home. I know that I just need to understand as now he needs to work and earn as much as he can before he couldnt work in the future. Anyway, the bad feeling just went through for a few seconds and then it went back to normal thing again. I have also been told that one of my friends is having a tough college life and she dint not feel like going back to school again. But I have a different thought, I hope my new semester could start earlier as the heavy workload would push me on in my life without daydreaming all the time and make myself sad.
At the end of the day, I did know a lot from them and we are sure to be keeping in touch in the future. I'm looking forward to the next gathering on next Wednesday and more people will attend on that day.

Lonely Christmas

Well, I dont really celebrate Christmas. Yet, my family has done some visiting from one house to another. Quite tiring for me and I dont really like, especially when comes to visiting those homes which were full of unknown strangers. You dont really talk much and eventually feel bored facing them for hours. There was another sad thing during this lonely Christmas, I dint receive any presents. Only a lovely kiss through the air from him and nothing else. What a day...... boring day I could say...... My only wish for this year Christmas would be, "I wish the next Christmas will be better with more joy and presents."

Back from Beijing Trip

I went to Beijing last week. We attended the midnight flight and it was torturing. I cant sleep the whole night in the plane and we need to walk from places to places the next day. It was freaking cold there. I knew it was winter and it would be cold, but I couldnt believed that it was THAT cold. You wouldnt imagine how many layers I wore. In Beijing 4 layers and in Cheng De, 6 layers. I dint even sweat for 1 week. I like the restaurant, shops, hotels and the bus the most only because of one thing - the heater. The sceneries were nice, relaxing, beautiful, breathtaking views.... but the food was awful! All of them looked like glues to me...sticky food for 7 days...
There was one thing i quite enjoy doing...the bargaining time in the flea market
I can even get 90% discount from the actual price. I feel so proud of myself....haha!! Some of them can get 7 sets of Olympics key chains for 1 yuan(RM 0.50)...can you imagine how desperate they are?
7 days in Beijing was more than enough....I cant stand for another one day because of the temperature. It was totally a torture for me. I wouldnt want to go there again for the rest of my life.